Dear 25 year old me,

Whoah. That was fast! In less than a week, I will be right in the middle of thirty and forty. Thirty five!!! I still remember when I turned twenty-five. My sister sent me a bouquet of flowers and the card said, “Enjoy your twenties, they will fly right by you.” I knew then and I know now that she was right.

Equipped with what I know today, here are 25+1 things I’d share with my 25 year old self (some of which I still need to remind myself in my thirties).

Please share with me what your hindsight wisdom has taught you? What would you tell your 25 year old self? I look forward to hearing what you have to share.

25th-Birthday

25+1 things I would tell my 25 year old self.

  1. By now you should have a list of those whose opinions matter to you and deserve to know your story and truth. If you don’t have a list, grab a pen. Make your list and put it somewhere where it will serve as a constant reminder. This list will make your choices and priority setting much easier.
  2. Appreciate your body. You are likely in the best shape of your life with very little discipline required. Exercise and set yourself up for a physically fit future.
  3. Empathy can be taught and learned. It does not mean that you make somebody’s problem your own. You are not the solution to everyone’s problem. Empathy means that you are with someone else in what they’re going through.
  4. Forgiveness and Kindness. Practice these acts with others and especially yourself. Do this more and more each day.
  5. Your brain starts to solidify by the age of 25. Though not as flexible, change is still possible. Get uncomfortable. Challenge yourself to take on different interests. Study or do things that you normally do not gravitate towards. Take on a new language. Learn something new. Put that lazy brain to work. Do not get stale.
  6. While you’re rapidly adulting, your parents are aging just as fast. Enjoy your parents as much as you can.
  7. Help!!! Asking for it doesn’t make you any less. Ask for it when needed and help others when you can. The most successful people I know, know how to ask for help and delegate well. There is always someone willing  to help.
  8. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
  9. Remember that powerful zit that would resurface all throughout high school and make a special appearance every now and then in college? Well that’s the same with underlying issues. Spend time and do the work to tend to things that are broken. They will resurface until there’s resolve.
  10. Buy well. Buy once.
  11. Your gut. Trust it. You may not have the tools to know what to do with the information it’s sharing with you and that’s okay. Just listen. You are more in tune with yourself than you give yourself credit for. Start cultivating a trusting relationship between you and your inner-self.
  12. Know that you are enough.
  13. That quote, “If you truly love someone, set them free.” Well, eff that. When someone truly loves you, they will make sure that you’re theirs. None of this “set you free” fluff. Do not waste your time on someone who is not as committed or does not share the same goals as you.
  14. Keep dreaming, darlin’. Keep dreamin’. You have the time and energy to make them happen. As you continue to take on more and more each day, you will also take on the dreams of others. Your dreams need you to be selfish. Don’t push them to the back burner.
  15. We all speak a different love language. Just because you are not being loved and cared for in the way that you want, it does not mean that you are loved or cared for any less. (Of course this is not referencing the unhealthy kind of love/ care, to which I would say, run!)
  16. You should have a good idea of what your values are by now. Align and surround yourself with people who share the same values as you.
  17. Set expectations and boundaries in every aspect of your life.
  18. Marriage and Divorce. Between 25 and 35, a lot of your friends will be getting married. Some will be getting divorced too. Be there for them. You may (or may not) be getting married or divorced. Operate on your own timeline. Not society’s timeline, your own.
  19. Start to cook for yourself. Start with once a week then take on some more if you can. Over time, you will get better at it. You can never be accountable for your health if you don’t start by prepping the very food that goes into your body.
  20. You probably have a damn good PPO plan, giving you the flexibility to see whatever doctor you want. Spend more time finding yourself a great doctor than you would finding a good hair dresser. Don’t hop from one doctor to another. Having a doctor who knows all about you and your medical history is a luxury you can make happen and something you will definitely appreciate in your thirties. Once you’ve done this, find yourself a good hairdresser. It’s all about priorities.
  21. Protect the Relationship (PTR). Your parents, true friends, esteemed colleagues, partner, endearing siblings, children, nieces and nephews. They are all evolving, just like you. Dynamics change. While we are all at different phases, we owe it to ourselves to do our part to protect our valued evolving relationships. Do your part. Always PTR.
  22. Everyone tells you and you know it. Time is on your side. It’s paralyzing. Start by doing something that brings you joy. Do this each day (even if just for a bit). While you’re doing that…make time to get your real estate license. You will be glad you did. Speaking of time, have fun! Make time for fun.
  23. In a few years, you will be invited to your 10 year class reunion. Go. Yes, you’re already connected to all the people you want to be connected to on Facebook. This is true. As the years go by, your class is only getting smaller and smaller. People die.
  24. Sunscreen, water, and floss. Apply lots of it and drink lots of water. Oh and floss. You’ve got some decent genes, but you still need to take good care of yourself. Your skin will thank you for this.
  25. Now is your time to define and develop healthy habits. Remember what I said about the brain earlier (#5)? In your thirties, you’re going to be more and more set in your ways. May as well make them healthy habits that you’re sticking to. Your thirties will be so thankful you did.
  26. Pray. Pray each and every single day.

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